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| Iguana, acrylic on canvas |
Creating,
whether one writes, paints, arranges flowers, or what have you, takes a person
outside him- or herself. That’s always been my experience. I can be lost in a
manuscript on the computer or in layers of paint on a canvas for hours, oblivious
not only to the passage of time but also to pain and hunger.
Painting,
for me at least, for as much as it takes me outside myself, it also takes me
inside—to a different place, a deeper place, somewhere beyond the conscious.
There is something primal about pushing paint around on canvas. Even when it is
a frustrating exercise, which it often is, there is still something uniquely
satisfying about it. Contradiction upon contradiction. It is both energizing
and calming.
I
scarcely recall a time when I did not paint, and I can’t imagine a time when I
won’t want to. I’m certainly not alone in persevering despite various odds:
finding the time, energy, and drive to ignore the side effects of my cancer
therapy and just get on with it. Some famous examples are worth considering.
Painter Georgia O’Keeffe in her final years continued to paint even as macular
degeneration dimmed her eyesight. Classical pianist Arthur Rubinstein did not
give up performing until he was virtually blind. Both continued creating into
their nineties. Ludwig van Beethoven began experiencing hearing loss early on
and was nearly totally deaf when he composed some of his best-known works.
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| Cat Chair, acrylic on canvas |
Modern
artist Henri Matisse was diagnosed with abdominal cancer at age seventy-two.
When surgery left him bed- and chair-bound, he turned from painting to creating
paper cut-outs, for which he became almost as well known as for his earlier
paintings. He continued creating in this new way for the next decade until his
death at age eighty-four. Impressionist painter Pierre-Auguste
Renoir
developed rheumatoid arthritis that left his hands paralyzed and so had his
brushes strapped to his hands in order to continue painting until his death at
seventy-eight.
If
you are a creative person — a writer, a painter, a composer, a performer — you
cannot not work, you cannot simply
stop. You must create. Against all odds.
Note: Displayed are two recent paintings
I composed as remembrances of a vacation trip to Puerto Rico a couple of months
ago.
